Now This Is Drunk - News Story

Thanks Rich K.

A Guy Walks into a Bar and is Ridiculed by his Peers

Coffee Machine Harassment

image: coffee machine
Every day, a male employee walks up very close to a female co-worker at the coffee machine.
He stops, inhales quite deeply and says that her hair smells nice.
After a week of this, the woman can't stand it anymore.
She takes her issue to a supervisor in Human Resources and asks to file a sexual harassment grievance against the guy.
The supervisor is puzzled and asks, "What's threatening about a co-worker telling you your hair smells nice?"
"It's Frank. The Midget."

Forwarded by Jim K.

A Drunk in a Grocery Store

image: grocery store girl
A woman was shopping at her neighborhood grocery store where she put the following items in her basket: one dozen large eggs, one pound of honey ham, one box of brownie mix, one twelve pack of soda, two pounds of coffee, and one-half gallon of butter milk.

As she was placing her items on the conveyor belt at the checkout, a drunk man standing behind her watched very closely. As the cashier was totaling her items, the drunk boldly stated, “You must be single."

The woman was taken off guard, but she was intrigued by the drunk’s prediction, since she was in fact a single girl. She looked at her food items on the counter and saw nothing unusual about her purchase that could have informed the drunk that she was single.

Curiously, she said, "Yes, you're right. But how in the world did you know that?"

The drunk slurred, "‘because you're ugly as sin. "