Young Lady: Is there a problem, officer?
Cop: Yes, you were speeding.
Young Lady: I don't think I was speeding officer.
Cop: Can I see your drivers license?
Young Lady: I don't have one.
Cop: Why don't you have a drivers license?
Young Lady: They took it away for good after the third DUI.
Cop: May I see your automobile registration papers?
Young Lady: I'm unable to do that either.
Cop: Why is that ma'am?
Young Lady: This car is stolen.
Cop: You're telling me you stole this car?
Young Lady: Yes, and I also murdered the person that actually owns the car.
Young Lady: I cut him up into small pieces with a chainsaw. His body parts are in the trunk.
The Cop looks at the woman, then takes a few steps backwards, grabs his radio transmitter and calls for back up. Two minutes later four police cars close in on her car. A police captain slowly walks up to her car, with his gun partially drawn.
Captain: Miss, could you get out of your vehicle!
The lady steps out of her car.
Young Lady: What seems to be the problem?
Captain: One of my men called in that you have stolen this
car and killed the owner.
Young Lady: I haven't killed anyone.
Captain: Well, could you please open the trunk of your car,
The lady opens up the trunk, showing nothing but an empty trunk.
Captain: Is this your car, miss?
Young Lady: Yes, here's the registration.
The first cop is very puzzled.
Captain: One of my men claims that you don't have a drivers
The lady opens her purse and takes out her drivers license and
hands it to the caption. The caption looks at her license which is valid and current.
He looks very confused.
Captain: Thank you miss, one of my officers told me you didn't
have a license, that you stole this vehicle, and that you killed and chopped
up the owner.
Young Lady: I bet that lying son of a bitch told you I was speeding too.